Alive for the Moment

[Stage Notes:: Cool breeze drifting through the open window]
[iTunes:: Beneath the Surface | Souljahz]

When I was coming back from class half an hour ago, my neighbor noticed me and asked how I was doing. My response was that I am alive, for the moment. He followed up by asking what I meant by that so I explained the massive amount of work I have to do by tomorrow and hinted at the possibility of it killing me before the night is through.

We all have times like this in life when we feel like it is just One of those days. One of those days that you just might, completely hypothetically speaking, knock over both of your beverages in the cafeteria in a two minute time period...One of those Days. The days where we wish the mountain in front of us really was a mole hill, but we know the truth. The most frustrating part about these days is of course that everyone around you is inevitably having a fantastic day (or at least appear to be)

As I thought about all of this, I realized something that while it may not be particularly profound, definately hit me like a proverbial Ton of Bricks. I discovered that there is a huge difference between:

Alive, for the moment.
-and-
Alive for the moment.

Yes, I know there is a grammatical difference in that one has a comma and one does not. The realization is how dramatically the comma changes the meaning. Sound it out with me. The first one is Alive PAUSE for the moment. Very good. Now lets try the second one. Alive for the moment. Remember no comma = no pause.

Anyone else catching the difference yet? (Oh dear this is sounding to sound like I am teaching a lesson....)

Alive, for the moment, implies that soon I will not be. Alive for the moment, implies being alive for each and every moment, and that is exactly what I want to be. To feel alive in every moment and fully experience every moment. I loathe how often I miss out on moments because I am tired or just plain zoned out. From this moment on I am challenging myself to be Alive for the moment.

Are you willing to challenge yourself to do the same?

Alive, or something like that

[Stage Notes:: Head throbbing, too many thoughts running through my head]
[TV:: Commercials]

First and foremost, I would like all of you to take a second to pray for my friend Alex and his family. Alex underwent a very risky back surgery today. The surgery appears to have been successful, but it is still early. He now has a very long road to recovery and this will no doubt be very challenging emotionally on the family. Thank you!

As for me? Well, as the Germans say, Mann lebt. Roughly translated it means, I'm alive. I have survived the first two days of tutoring and for the first time, have some ideas about what to do tomorrow. It is hard though when the two students are so different academically. It basically means I have to write two lesson plans for each day. Other than that, I am just dealing with the general confusion that comes with life and trying to understand the mysteries that lie ahead.

Classes are going pretty well, though they are about to ramp up again. Up until this point, I did not have any math content class because the professor was still teaching at Colorado State. From what I have seen, I am pretty sure I am going to love this class.

It really seems like I should have more to say, but I just can't think right now. I am going to try to get back into the swing of blogging regularly, but I am making no promises. If you have any specific questions, ask them in the comments and I will do my best to answer. That might help me focus on a topic :)

Buried Alive

[Stage Notes:: Camp Hangover]
[Noise:: Fans until I can figure out what to listen to/watch]

Not going to say a whole lot other than I did go to camp which was definately the right thing to do and now I am buried under a mountain of work. I am hoping to be able to look back at the end of the night and see that it was only a mole hill, but it does not appear to be that from where I am now. Rather than babble on, I will leave. Here's hoping that I survive.

We are Go; No Go for Launch...

[Stage Notes:: Irritated]

Dr. D :: Absolutely Not...well Maybe
Mr. W :: It's workable
Dr. D :: That's a Roger on the Go
Fr. L :: Fine
Dr. S :: Good to go
Sr. G :: Sure

Dr. D :: ....I never said we are a Go....
Me :: ?!?!?!?!

I wish people would make up their minds and stick with them. This count down sequence is not an easy abort....

Just Pray.

Initiating the Countdown Sequence...

[Stage Notes:: mmmm...Goldfish]
[iTunes:: Heaven Forbid | The Fray]

Sorry, I just haven't felt like writing lately. This weekend was kind of a strange one for me so I guess I will just let you all know what happened.

Friday night started out like any great weekend should by going to see the opening of Ocean's 13! The movie was a fantastic combination of the plot line of the first movie, the humor of the second one, and the nostalgia of the original version with the Rat Pack. So far it ranks number one in terms of 'Third' movies coming out this summer...just to recap these are the scheduled ones:

• Spiderman 3
• Shrek the Third
• Pirates of the Carribean: At Worlds End
• Bourne Ultimatum
• Ocean's 13
• Live Free or Die Hard (Technically the fourth but then again there are sort of two different second movies)
• Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix(Yes this one is the fifth, but this list is now officially third or later movies)
• Rush Hour 3

Looking at that list makes me sad and wishes writers would be more creative. Anyways we are getting off topic.

After the movie, we went back to the dorms and chilled out since many of us were supposed to take the Praxis in the morning. Well after a fair amount of chilling, I remembered that I needed batteries for my calculator and so I went to meijer. When I was ready to check out, I came to the startling realization that my wallet had decided that we needed a trial separation period. Silly me, I must have left it in the dorm right? Wrong. Crud.

Back to the theater, back to meijer, back to the dorm. No wallet. Double Crud.

No wallet = No ID = No Praxis Test...Triple Crud
No wallet = No ID = No Meal Plan...(you get the picture)

Needless to say that made for a rather frustrating weekend because I just couldn't get focused. It also happened that we had a huge paper and a project due yesterday at noon. I eventually managed to finish the paper and project and get them turned in, but I was up really late Sunday. I have also contacted everyone I could possibly think of and the conclusion is that my wallet has perminantly left me. Life is weird like that sometimes.

Before I forget, Sunday morning was also a challenge, though in a good way. After talking to the two other protestants in the program, we decided to check out a near by Methodist church that had a very cool description on the ND website for other faiths. My heart broke walking into a church that had maybe 15 people in it when we walked in and about 35-40 by the start of service. I was also saddened by the pastor's views on some of Paul's teachings. Though keeping all things in mind, I was intrigued and am undecided about returning. Though my desire is to be in community with the other protestants so it will be interesting to see how that plays out. Perhaps the most notable thing though was the discussion on the way home and also for a little while when we got back to campus about Women's roles in the church. While the two of us differ on opinion over this matter, it was wonerful to get a chance to engage in a honest discussion about it and to be challenged as well as hopefully challenge the other individual's belief. I am really excited to have more of these conversations so we can help eachother to grow throughout the summer. Oh and in case you were wondering why I did not provide a name or anything more about the individual it is because I haven't talked to them about including them in the blog. Deal with it and then re-read it if it was a problem. :-P

Other than that, things are going well since I will be able to go to camp. Long story short, God is good, and has impeccable planning. This was also decided on Friday further complicating the feelings of the weekend. Now I just have to make sure I can get everything done.

Why, It's ACE14...the've gone to....PLAID

[Stage Notes:: Room is sweltering, Lesson plan on printer waiting to be proofread]
[iTunes:: Save the Day | Train]

It is late and I am tired so I am likely going to mix metaphors and cliches and quotes and all that jazz, but this is my blog so you can leave if you want too...when you are done reading :-P Oh and of course commenting and telling me how much my silence has utterly devistated you.

Ok, all kidding aside, I would like to ask all of you to take a moment and pray for my friend Billy and his family. Billy's mom fought valiently against cancer and was finally called back home Today. Pray that Billy and his family can rejoice in the end of her pain and the start of her eternal life with God, and that they will continue to tell stories and remind eachother of her.

That said, it is probably time to give an update on my own endeavors. First, think about the cartoons you watched growing up...or that your 'Friend' was watching yesterday afternoon when they got home from work and did not feel like making dinner. Got some funny moments in your head? Filter them down to the one where one of the charecters (usually the villian ironically enough) runs off screaming through about a dozen walls leaving only their shape in the wall behind.

I am at a point where real world and cartoon physics are melding in that I can understand what the villan feels like after running through that many walls.

Life has been crazy and extremely busy with classes going from 8:30 am to 10:00 pm with breaks for lunch and dinner and an extended break before the 8-10 class because I am in the late computer class. There has been extensive reading most nights and several pages of righting to do. I usually finish the day around 12:30 and then get up in the morning to proofread the paper. The classes we are taking right now are typically symester long classes being taught in 4-9 class periods. Yes my friends, that is officailly ludacrous speed...

Fortunately by Monday, things will slow down, but that is not before having to take the Praxis II test and write several papers this weekend. Though despite all of this, it seems like this is a good program to be a part of and I have certainly met a ton of new people. Well, it is time for bed so I must apologize to any of you who hoped my next post would in fact cover more of the teaser stuff I talked about in the last post. I am just two tired for it right now.

Though I did end up finding my roomate...he was in Chicago...

And it Starts...

[Stage Notes:: Room lit by a single lamp, fans blowing, tummy grumbling]
[iTures:: Looking for Angels | Skillet]

Well it is definately official, I am back in school. I just spent 4 hours reading for classes that start tomorrow! Needless to say I am a tad drained and at the same time quite curious to see what happens in class tomorrow because there was a lot of stuff I did not agree with. If I get a chance tomorrow, I will try to expand and might have some more insight into what life is going to be like on a daily basis. As for right now, I need a snack and sleep because we have a very full day tomorrow.

Oh, I also need to talk about Granger and some of the people I met. That is really more a note to myself than it is a teaser for you.

Random side note; I lost one of my roomates...no seriously, I don't know where he is....

Vroom Vroom

[Stage Notes:: Sitting on my freshly made bed, waiting for roomates to go to bed]
[Noise:: Roomate unpacking & Fan Noise | The Music of the Night]

I made it. I am officially on campus at the University of Notre Dame.

It was a very long day. I woke up this morning around 8:30 and finished packing up the car. After a quick omlete and a few goodbyes, I was off. All in all I made pretty good time on the drive, though the car was definately struggling with all the additional weight. Dad noticed that the back wheels where only about an inch from the car; thank goodness for low profile tires.

Moving in was a tad hectic. I am on the second floor which equates to about two and a half flights of stairs. I have two roomates who both seem cool, but hey it is the first day so everyone seems cool. I managed to get everything into the room which is a plus because we really do not have much room. Maybe if I get some time, I will take some pictures to try and give a feel for where we are living. It is sort of one very small room attached to another small round room. As cool as the round room is, it makes it quite difficult to arrange long rectangular furniture. Oh well, we have time to get that figured out.

Other than that, it was just another flurry of faces and names as we played some games and listened to some people talk. We finished up around 10 and have to be up at the bookstore around 8 tomorrow so they are keeping us quite busy. Well I should get some sleep. Night.